Anatomy
2021
It was really, really annoying to try to figure out the model’s pose via Zoom camera. Now I have to fight through two layers of distortion: my own eyes, and the angle of the model’s video camera.
Trying to pick up drawing after not touching it for almost ten years does not help, either.
However, I am still grateful that this was somehow happening. Without COVID I would never even THINK of picking up drawing.
I found myself still struggling with the weight analysis of the model’s pose.
It feels weird to “empathize” with another person in such a physical manner. As a therapist, I am used to empathize with people I work with emotionally - and I really seldom have to think, on which feet they are putting the majority body weight on? I was trained to ask “what does it mean for you”, and never got to look at the existence itself.
How fascinating.
I love my job as a therapist; however, sometime I do mourn about losing the chance permanently of following my childhood talent and becoming a professional artist.
It doesn’t bother me too much anymore though, these days. I got to love my patients and appreciate the beauty of their humanity — and in drawing I got to love the human body, the creation of math and physics by the Great Nature.
Digital Drawing
Jan-March 2021
I never learned how to draw digitally. Getting used to digital drawing pads and the extra sensitive eraser is still pretty unpleasant - I am getting there slowly, though.
Gosh, it feels good to think I can make so many mistakes and just try all kinds of paint brushes out, and I can take my time to play with every digital processing as long as I want to.
I will keep trying, not making money through this thing anyway lol!
I don’t think I ever felt so free with my full-time profession. Pros and cons, I guess? I can’t kill a model if the digital processing feels awkward. In my full-time work though, I do feel a sense of responsibility, a fear of making mistakes and messing up someone’s life. Someone trusted me with their time and effort, and someone I really do care.